Sikh weddings are very beautiful. The couple sits before the Sikh scripture/Guru and takes four levels of vows. Here is a peek, the Sikh scripture in on the altar (throne), draped in red:

The world over, religious wedding ceremonies are joyous and sacred. And wedding receptions are fun. YouTube has many hilarious examples of Western couples and friends staging amusements for wedding guests. This is my favorite:

Turns out that Michael Jackson has universal humor appeal. Here are some Sikh Singh’s attempting their own “Billy Jean” dance at a Sikh wedding reception – they are good too!



Filed under Inspiring, Multicultural, Sikhi, VIDEOS

5 responses to “Weddings!

  1. Harmander Singh

    Dear Kamalla Rose Kaur,

    You must mention the example sent to SIE as a guide to Sikh weddings for non-Sikhs – called ‘Four laps and a piss-up’ it came around the time of Hugh Grant’s film, Four weddings and a Funeral.

  2. kamallarosekaur

    OK Harmander Singh, since you insist, here it is:

    Four Laps and a Piss-Up
    A Guide to Sikh Weddings For NonSikhs

    If you are invited to a Sikh wedding, don’t panic, here is an insiders guide to what each bit on the invitation card really means.

    1.Reception of Barat

    The Barat is the Groom’s tribe which invariably arrives late in dribs and drabs and in a state which thinly disguises the fact that many have had a skinful and some may still have much contraband on their person. The ‘reception’ usually takes place at the entrance to or in the courtyard of the Gurdwara and takes the form of much shouting and wailing (mainly by women) commencing from the moment the hordes first come in to view.

    To the finely tuned ear it is obvious that juicy insults are attempted to be set to tune but very little rehearsal time may be just one of the cause’s of the non-synchronized efforts.

    When the opposition has been lined up in a stand off position, the Ardas (equivalent of the Lord’s Prayer) is mumbled by the Giani (Priest, the learned one or someone on a visitor’s visa and here for the money) and mimed by the shameless. Non-Sikhs are advised to take off their shoes and cover their heads (not with the shoes silly) and observe and copy the rest in silence or else.


    Milni is loosely translated as ‘to meet’ and is the formal meeting of the heads of the households (‘who wears the trousers’). It take the form of exchange of token gifts (like team captains at football matches swapping pennants) but some flash gits have ruined this laudable tradition and try showing off by showering all the chieftains from the Groom’s tribe (his old man in particular) with tons of unsavoury and tasteless jewellery. This could involve hundreds of people – some only who come out of the woodwork and are seen at weddings and the palaver goes on for hours but the more orthodox concentrate on perhaps the Bride and Groom’s legitimate fathers and one or two decent uncles.

    Having had embarrassing photos taken of the fake loving hugs during the exchange of gifts, there is usually a mad rush by the Groom’s tribe to where the food is.The food (at this time of the morning) usually comprises samosa, pakoras, jalebis, ladoos and barfi served with steaming hot tea or Coke (the drinking variety) in cramped conditions and with disingenuous smiles.


    This is the religious bit and takes place in the Darbar Sahib (main hall) where the Sri Guru Granth Sahib (Sikh Holy Book) is present.The Granthis (those who supposedly know how to respect the Holy Book) and Gianis force the intended victims (the couple) to sit cross legged in front of the Holy Book with a posse of female minders to prevent any escape attempts with the rest of the sleepy congregation/guests behind them.

    After the spiritual rituals of identifying the guilty parties (by making them stand up when all else are asleep in a whacked out and uncomfortable to **** positions) and another (silent) Ardas, the religious wedding bit takes place by the Groom dragging the Bride around the Holy Book four times – the Bride is usually comforted/consoled by ‘the brothers’ during each of the laps.The couple attempt to time each lap to coincide with the completion of the verse singing by the now drowsy Gianis before sitting down in their original spots.

    After the four laps are completed, the couple and the rest have to endure a series of hymn singing, advice from hypocrites and pleas for contributions to the building fund, natural or man-made disasters and directions to the booze palace before being set free by a final verse from the Holy Book and the receiving of Holy Food (Karah Parshad). The couple then just sit there like lemons so the punters can pat them on the head and pose for photos/video shots of them giving dodgy money before pushing and shoving everyone else to find their shoes and illegally parked motors so as to get to where the booze is – fast.


    This is often in a hall which is never large enough but miles away. The reason for the hall being too small is two fold – one, Western society just cannot comprehend the size of Sikh events (we always want to be bigger and possibly better than everyone else) and two, loads of gatecrashers/freeloaders tend to crawl out of the woodwork knowing there is going to be free booze, food and pretty women at the do.

    At the hall, more by chance or luck than judgement or planning, nibbles, soft drinks and beer is laid out before guests arrive by which time spirits start materialising in plentiful quantities. The equivalent of tandoori chicken, lamb chops and the like are served to semi-****ed guests who are also semi-deaf by now due to extremely loud music being throbbed continuously since their arrival After about two hours, everyone picks themselves off the floor to acknowledge the arrival of the married couple who eventually cut the cake, attempt to dance and then tuck into their packed lunch (just joking). The main course is served soon after to allow the puke ups to have that special colour and stench before the fights break out.

    Eventually, people start leaving, often of their own accord or with friends/relatives who can still remember where their cars are parked and sometimes accompanied by police or immigration officers.


    The times on the invites are indicative only and no account should be taken of them – add half an hour for each successive item throughout the day.

    Women who defiantly wish to wear short skirts to the Gurdwara should only do so if they got legs worth looking at and don’t care if they look stupid trying to sit crosslegged on the floor with their knickers showing.

    There is never a wedding list for presents but book tokens are definitely out.
    Spare a thought for the (now) poor ****** who has to pay for all of this.

  3. Gurmit Singh

    These days, Sikh marriages are like funfair and display of dirty money for cheap popularity or say show off.

    Guru Granth Sahib is for ceremony purpose only but it generates good goluck for the Management as well as for Bhais and Raagis. All are happy.

    We hardly try to get married with God as desired in Sohila (page 12-13) and Suhi Mahla 4 at page 773-774 of Guru Granth Sahib.

  4. kamallarosekaur

    Lavaan (Marriage Ceremony)
    Guru Ram Das
    Page 773 SGGS

    In the first round of the marriage ceremony, the Beloved One gives instructions for performing the daily duties of married life. Instead of singing hymns to the various gods, embrace righteous conduct and renounce sinful actions. Meditate on the Naam; embrace and enshrine the contemplation of the Naam (constant awareness of Creator/Creation). Worship and adore Guruji, the Perfect True Guide (the Sikh scripture), and all your sins and mistakes shall be dispelled.
    By great good fortune, bliss is attained, and the Beloved One is so sweet to the mind. Servant Nanak proclaims that, in this state, the first round of the marriage ceremony has begun.

    In the second round of the marriage ceremony, the Divine One leads you to meet Guruji, the Primal Being. With fear and awe of the Supreme One, with the Fearless One in mind, egotism is eradicated. With the fear/awe of the Supreme One, with the Immaculate One in mind, sing Glorious Praises, and behold the Divine Presence before you. The Supreme Soul, is the only Master of the Universe; pervading and permeating everywhere, filling all spaces. Deep within, and outside as well, there is only the One Reality. Meeting together, humble servants of the One sing these songs of joy. Servant Nanak proclaims that, in this, the second round of the marriage ceremony, the unstruck sound of the Shabad resounds.

    In the third round of the marriage ceremony, the mind is filled with Divine Love. Meeting with honest and humble Sants, I have found the Beloved One, by great good fortune. I have found the Immaculate One, and I sing Praise. I speak the Word of the Bani (prayers). By great good fortune, I have found humble Sants, and I speak the Unspoken Speech of the Beloved One. The Naam of the Beloved One resonates within my heart. Meditating on my Beloved, I have realized my destiny; which the Supreme has inscribed upon my forehead. Servant Nanak proclaims that, in this, the third round of the marriage ceremony, the mind is filled with Divine Love.

    In the fourth round of the marriage ceremony, my mind has become peaceful; I have found the Beloved One. As Gurmukh, I have met Guruji, with ease. Creator/Creation seems so sweet to my mind and body. The Beloved One seems so sweet. I am pleasing to my Beloved. Night and day, I lovingly focus my consciousness on the Beloved One. I have obtained my real Master, the fruit of my mind’s desires. The Naam resonates. The Divine One, my only Master, blends with the soulbride, and her heart blossoms forth in the Naam. Servant Nanak proclaims that, in this, the fourth round of the marriage ceremony, we experience Eternal Union.

  5. True, Lavaan (Marriage Ceremony) in Sikhism is telling the way to Get Married to God. It shows the path how to become loyal to God and how to reach the level where a man can become part of God. Even we are part of God but we don’t know this fact, so these four steps take you to that level where Only One Exists – GOD

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